- Me: Fucking die already
- Me: I swear to jesus if I die one more time
- Me: I'M GONNA KILL A MAN I FUCKING DIED AGAIN
- Me: Oh shit hottie alert
- Me: Move bitch, get out the way
- Me: *high pitched screaming*
- Me: Load already
- Me: uNACCEPTABLE
- Me: I'm fucking done. Done. Done with everything.
- Me: *turns off console*
- Me: *turns console back on*
- Me: God fucking dammit.
to quote hamlet act III scene iii line 92, “no”
when your teacher gossips about other teachers
PE is 5% exorcise and 95% embarrassment
what kind of gym class do you have that exorcises their kids
I laughed so fucking hard jesus
if you’ve ever liked my selfie you’re going to heaven
This week on Tumblr:
It’s a metaphor. You’re a metaphor. I’m a metaphor. Your keybord is a metaphor. Everything is a metaphor. The universe is turning into one giant metaphor on a molecular scale. Run. It’s too late.
- person: OMG YOU DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE TEST???!?!?!
- me: nope
- person: BUT HOW ARE YOU GONNA PASS???
- me: i'm not
you’ve been hit by
you’ve been struck by
moms are so temperamental you say one thing like “have you seen my hoodie” and theyre like your HOODIE??? YOUR HOODIE???? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY THINGS I HAVE TO DO EVERY DAY AND YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO KEEP TRACK OF YOUR HOODIE? NOBODY HELPS ME IN THIS HOUSE I DO EVERYTHING BY MYSELF AND NOBODY ASKS HOW I AM YOUR FATHER IS AN ALCOHOLIC